I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
