State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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