none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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