It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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