I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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