she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize