Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
