I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
