I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
