Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
