plz talk dirty to me
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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