Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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