plz talk dirty to me
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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