small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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