hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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