If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
