You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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