I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
