you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Randomize
