I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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