Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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