I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
