its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
