everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
