There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
