I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
