im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
