I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
