the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
