So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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