Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
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