didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
