so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
