is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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