Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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