And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize
