It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
