Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
