i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
