Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
