mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
