Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Boobs are out for the taking
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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