idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
