just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
