my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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