turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
