you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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