I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
