I think I died a long time ago.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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