the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
